Sophie and I stood in darkness on the edge of a cliff, the wind whipping through our hair and cutting into our skin with ferocity.

I turned to her and realised she was looking at me with fear in her eyes, hurt, betrayal. I tried to hold onto her but she ripped herself away and retreated from me.

I cried out. The wind only began to roar, and I felt it vibrate through me. I looked down at my hands, and realised it was coming from me.

Sophie broke into a run, and as she got further and further away the rest of the world around us came into focus, piercing my eyes.

Utter devastation, and I knew, somehow, that it was all my fault.

As the world warped and dissolved around me, I realised that I was dreaming. But that didn't bring me any solace.

I dreamt what Lexie had been dreaming for months - the vision of Jayken, tortured and screaming, writhing on the ground. Except even this wasn't truly a dream, it was a memory now. I'd seen it through her eyes, and my own. And that had been my fault too.

I dreamt that I emerged from the gel matrix to find the room still, body after body scattered and deprived of life. I picked through the room, trying to find a way out and saw Jayken, Lexie, Sophie. I felt a hollow ache and knew I needed to get away, to escape. All the technology was dead too, there was no way of contacting anyone. I managed to coax a Staarus ship to life and launched myself across an empty star system, returned to Flauraan. Here, too, corpses littered the streets. With my house empty, I headed to the fields and found my mother, collapsed and beginning to decompose. I shook off my feelings and headed to my hill, certain that that would fix things somehow but as I reached the crest I saw a bright star in the sky, plummeting towards me. A fresh start, perhaps? A chance to try again? I ran frantically down the hill and plunged through the forest, with nothing to halt my progress, and emerged to find only wreckage. I dug through the debris and found my father's body, broken and burned. And with this it finally hit me; I killed all these people, the whole world, the entire Staarus System.

When I finally awoke I wasn't sure how to tell whether this was dream or reality. There was someone sitting beside my bed leant forward, sleeping with their head near my legs. There was something familiar about this, though that feeling only enhanced the dreamlike state of it all.

One detail after another emerged from the haze. Metallic walls, a sparse, enclosed space. Thin tubes of cool fluid and sensors attached to me. A telltale hum at the edges of my senses. I was in space. I was on a medical transport. I... supposed that made sense, with what I could remember.

I wished I wasn't here to remember it. That had been the plan. The moment I realised what I'd done... I knew it would take everything in me to stop it, and if I couldn't stop the hell we'd unleashed I didn't want to live to see it. Evidently I'd failed. I felt a deep, creeping darkness encroaching on me.

I'd figured it all out too late - the moment we'd sprung the trap, in fact - why Ray had let us go, why he hadn't killed Jayken in his experimentation. He knew that in our efforts to destroy the source of their scheme that we would trigger it. I thought of the Protector scanning Jayken's brain on the plains of Aandrigo, and telling us that he didn't have the same alterations of the other Weraynians, that the rift he'd gone through had removed it somehow. They didn't just test their signals on Jayken's brain in that prison, they reimplanted the force field damage so he would be susceptible to it again. And then they'd let us take him, save him, given us a glimmer of hope. In my desperation to hold onto that hope I'd doomed them all. I thought of Lexie, horrifying vision blossoming before her eyes, of the multi-layered vision I'd had inside the gel matrix. Feeling the connection to her, to Jayken, go taut and suddenly snap as she crumpled until it was just me in the matrix trying to salvage the mess we'd made while Sophie ran around doing the same on the outside. I'd never be able to rid myself of that feeling of loss, like the sudden hush after a storm.

I started to shake. The dim lights flickered. I glanced upwards in surprise, and flinched as something else stirred. I'd forgotten I wasn't alone, here, now. The person attending to me lifted their head, eyes bleary - Sophie, of course it was Sophie. I couldn't deal with this right now, I couldn't face the look in her eyes. If I was losing my grip on reality, my sense of self, I couldn't even imagine what was going on inside her head. I wanted to fade from existence, refuse to face the future that I'd wrought on us all. But there she was. I would have to confront it.

The first thing I noticed was her arm was gone. I mean, her prosthetic arm. It was only a stump now, again. I couldn't help myself from mining her expression for information, and the first thing I gleaned was that more time had passed than I'd thought. There was guilt there too, and worry, but not the same depth of brokenness I'd expected. Was it possible...

There were tears in her eyes, scaring me again. Time passed in a slurry as she reached out for my hand. "Abi..." she said simply, and the tears started to fall.

I couldn't cope with this. "Sophie," I rasped, and was shocked to hear the sorry state of my voice.

I still couldn't make sense of anything, couldn't sift through everything that had happened. Couldn't read Sophie's eyes through all the tears between us.

I forced myself to focus on something hopefully neutral, even though I couldn't care less what happened to me now.

"What's happening? Where are we going?" I asked, trying to keep my voice steady.

Sophie wiped her eyes with her sleeve. "Halapatov." she said and I frowned. "It's okay, everything's okay. The others are meeting us there. They wanted to stay with you but, well, it's complicated."

I fixed her with a troubled stare. What was she talking about? "The others?"

Now she was frowning. "Yeah, Lexie and Jayken. And-" She broke off as I started to tremble, panic in her eyes. She reached out and touched my face. "Abi? What's wrong?"

I was freaking out, hyperventilating. Making noises that were a mix between anguished and relieved, choking on them, body undulating. After a moment I could speak again, "They're alive?" I could barely make it through that sentence without sobbing, and there was a part of me that was sure this wasn't real, that she was lying to me, softening the blow.

Sophie took seconds to process and then grabbed my hand again and squeezed it. "Yes. Yes. They're alive. Why-" She shook her head. "They're fine, they're safe. I was just talking to Jayken an hour ago, they both wanted to check up on you." She pulled out her comms unit and showed it to me.

My eyes roved over the messages, and there was no doubting Jayken's voice in them, his concern and compassion. Warmth began to unfurl in my chest as I considered the possibility that I wasn't responsible for the deaths of people I loved.

I fixated on the device, I couldn't look at her. "I felt them die." I explained.

"They didn't." Sophie said softly. "That's not what happened. They're okay."

Not for the first time this war I found myself doubting my own perspective, my memory and perception. I forced myself to move my gaze from the messages to her face. "It was a trap." I laid the details out measuredly, as facts that needed confirmation. "We tried to sever the connection but we ended up triggering the signals. The whole room was affected." I paused, less sure of myself. "The whole world."

Sophie nodded somberly, crushing my hopes that perhaps I had remembered wrong, that the hell in that machine had been a dream as well. I swallowed.

"Lexie and I could see it, through the gel matrix and our powers, everyone writhing as the signals reached their brains. It was like I was keyed into their bodies, their heartbeats, like it was one big vascular system. We felt Jayken's heart stop, and then I lost the connection to Lexie as well, like she was affected by the shock. She was gone."

Sophie bit her lip. "Lexie did break the connection to the machine, and she fell, but that was it. Jayken's heart never stopped and neither did Lexie's. I was with them right away, they recovered fine once the signals were destroyed." She had a haunted look on her face I couldn't quite decipher. "Your heart was the one that stopped."

"So the plan worked?" I said in a small voice, hardly daring to believe it.

She nodded. "Even though their signals were unleashed. You had enough power to push them back. You saved so many people."

Something in her voice gave me pause. I studied her again. "But I didn't save everyone. I didn't stop it in time." She winced, and the panic rose in my chest again.

I held my head in my hands. "Oh god. How many people?"

"Abi..."

"How many?" I demanded, refusing to let her protect me from this knowledge.

She screwed up her face in pain. "I wish I could say zero. Everyone in our base survived. Proximity to the Machine helped a lot. But there were areas at the edge of our reach, where a few hundred people died." She paused and then said, "I know you were the one in the Machine, but that doesn't make this your fault."

I knew that logically. I knew that we had been a team of people, including Weraynians, who had known the risk of what we were doing and acted accordingly. I simply happened to be the unlucky one with the ability to reach beyond my mind and manipulate matter. I hadn't killed my friends, and our mission had prevented a genocide, but there was still blood on my hands. I could feel it, a phantom sensation from my time in the gel matrix.

Sophie was clearly struggling with the weight of it too. She'd had longer to grapple with it, days maybe sitting at my bedside. I wondered what the aftermath had been like for her. I could see in her eyes she was trying to suppress emotions . She was trying so hard to be strong, for my sake.

After a thoughtful second she spoke, "We were the ones who helped discover their plot, and I built the Machine, and you manned it. We destroyed the signals but triggered them in the process. But they would have been able to figure it out without us. They were already investigating the force field signals. They would have figured it out eventually, and they would have done something similar. It would have been more gradual, but more people probably would have died. We sped up the process, but we stopped it sooner. That has to count for something."

We stared silently at each other. She was echoing what I said to her after Riowyn died, trying to comfort her and ease her guilt at the teleport watch causing the ghosts to mass on Halapatov. And I'd been telling the truth; our presence there had escalated the preexisting situation but it had also meant we had the tools to stop it, in spite of the deaths that happened because of us. Sophie had rebuffed me in the moment but I got the sense that she'd carried my words with her and repeated them to herself often, that she'd gotten used to running this dialogue in her head to keep herself going. I wondered if that would be my fate, working through the logic of the situation on repeat to stop myself giving in to despair. I knew now how Sophie felt back then, the words couldn't be a balm, didn't change what had happened, could barely even penetrate the truth that we had ushered forth death. I felt like I was back on the streets of Halapatov, Riowyn's death hanging over us, the world broken in a way that couldn't be fixed. I thought of Riowyn using her powers to save us, severing the connection of the ghosts to our universe and giving her life in the process.

"I know how Riowyn felt now." I said, even though it probably wasn't helpful. "Watching us being pulled into the ghost world. She was willing to do anything to stop it. I didn't understand it then, it just seemed like her death was an accident, a side effect. But she poured everything she was into it, knowing she wouldn't survive. I understand her now."

Sophie's face was frozen. Perhaps I was just making things worse for both of us by dragging her down with me. I could see glimmers in her eyes of the ordeal she had endured, was enduring, the worry and pain. After a moment her expression softened and she said, "Me too."

What a horrible feeling to share with another person. We were broken in the same ways, over and over again in a cycle. I let the ghastly feelings turn over in my head a few times as we sat in silence. Then I forced myself to push through it, at least momentarily, for her sake and mine. I needed more information. I still had no idea what was happening, what had happened after the attack, how that led us to here... to Halapatov, apparently.

I leaned forward and touched her arm, gently. "So how long was I out? What's happening with the war now?"

She took a deep breath. "Well, it's been a few days but so much has happened. It wasn't long after everything happened that a ceasefire was called, although nobody knows how long that will last. Apparently a lot of Staarus people witnessed Weraynians being affected by the signals, and stopped the fighting. Not everyone obviously, but people were shaken up. And that just added to the protests that were already happening. And Rojjel and his team were able to track some aspect of the signal back to HQ, so they kind of quietly backed off. I don't really know what's happening with them."

"Rojjel's machine worked okay? They're all fine?" I shuddered involuntarily at the thought of engaging with the gel matrix in that haunted site on Halapatov.

Sophie nodded. "Yeah, no trouble on their end. Or at least, not like us. They had to fend off the Halapatovian forces a little. But everything with the Machine was fine." She shrugged. "They didn't have any Weraynians there, which made it easier. Although Terra was probably affected, I should ask them about it."

I let her ponder for a few moments and then prompted her, "So, ceasefire?"

Her attention snapped back. "Yes! They spent a bit of time checking on the Weraynian groups nearby, especially the worst affected places. Some of the Weraynians felt the ceasefire was too tentative, so they took the opportunity to destroy the rest of the force field stations. And luckily there wasn't much backlash there or anything. Hani and the others were contacted by Reeina and the Halapatovian High Court. There was a lot of discussion, negotiating. Hani put forward a long list of demands - all Staarus forces to withdraw from vicinity of Werayne, Aandriggians to be resettled, a full investigation and transparency on Staarus war crimes, especially at HQ, Weraynians on the High Council alongside Paladanians and Halapatovians. I heard it was pretty tense. There were some hostages exchanged. Most of the Staarus forces were sent to their home bases. They're not expecting to get all the other demands straight away, but it's still good to have the breather, with the war."

I nodded thoughtfully. "So why are we going to Halapatov now? And what happened to Lexie and Jayken?"

Her eyes searched my face as if expecting to see damage there. "They were with me the whole time, they waited with me while-" she hesitated but I caught the thread.

"While they resuscitated me?" She grimaced, which I took as confirmation. I remembered waiting in the hallway with Mickey unsure whether Beth would make it, about waiting for news about Sophie, felt again the desperation as we fixed up Jayken. I could see the ghost of that desperation in her eyes, and it wasn't hard to imagine her state while I'd been unconscious.

She plowed onward. "They wanted to be here when you woke up. But once the negotiations reached a standstill, it was suggested for a delegation of Weraynians to visit Halapatov, as a show of good faith from Staarus forces, you know, first Weraynians welcomed off planet in centuries sort of thing. They wanted our whole team there, if possible. And, well, if the thing on Halapatov goes badly the ceasefire won't last long, so Jayken realised if he wanted to see his mother again he'd need to go now, while movement was somewhat unrestricted. So he didn't feel like he had a choice, and I told them you would want him to go. So Alexa went with him and they said they'd be back as soon as they could. And then the next day we were told to go to Halapatov, and they said we'd meet back up there."

Tears welled up in my eyes. "But they did find his mum?" Sophie nodded, managing a smile. I smiled too; I didn't have words to express how thankful I felt that he'd survived long enough for that reunion. I altered tack as subtly as I could. "You've obviously been able to keep updated. That's good."

She shrugged. "Communication has improved a lot since the ceasefire started. And I haven't had much to do but talk to people. Everyone's asking about you."

I sensed something in her voice and straightened immediately. "You've talked to my parents?"

She nodded. "The receiver I installed on your roof still works pretty well, it seems. Your dad answered really quickly." I raised my eyebrows and she continued, "He's been home for a while, it seems, well before the ceasefire. I think it was only meant to be a short trip home before being deployed again but when he found out we were 'missing' he decided not to leave again. They were so relieved to hear you were alive. I didn't go into too much detail about everything that happened. I spent a long time trying to explain us defecting - they'd heard about the protests and obviously about Ray being arrested, so it wasn't a complete surprise, but they were, well, surprised that you'd switched sides after being so passionate about the war for so long."

"That's understandable." I agreed, and even that was an understatement.

"I don't know when you're gonna be able to go back home." Sophie said apologetically. "So I told them that. Maybe I should have waited until you woke up and we had more answers..."

"No, thank you, seriously, Sophie. Any information is better than nothing when you're waiting like that." I thought of my time when Sophie was missing, how thankful I would've been for any proof she was out there. She evidently guessed what I was thinking, and shifted a little uncomfortably. I changed tack again. "And you're like family to them, they would've been overjoyed to hear from you and know you were okay too."

Her expression softened a little. "They were, yeah."

A thought occurred to me, "What are we expected to do, when we arrive to Halapatov?"

Sophie shrugged. "I'm not sure. It sounds like they just want us present, not that they want anything from us. It's not just our team that's going, it's representatives from all over. Mickey told me he'll be there, as part of the Alliance and also supporting Satah and Rintoul."

"Oh, that's good." I said, adding more people to my list of reunions ahead of us. "What's happening with the Alliance now anyway?"

"Not sure about that either. We've had a bit of communication between the Weraynian and Staarus forces with the Alliance. It's not a priority at the moment but it looks like we'll be drawing up a new treaty, since the Staarus-Earth one is, uh, outdated."

For a moment, I could smell the remnant smoke on the wind as Sophie and I thrust our arms in the air, standing on a stage on Flauraan in front of our peoples, joyful and triumphant in our recent defeat of a Weraynian plot. A moment seared into my memory, but so alien to everthing I felt in this moment that it might as well have happened to someone else. Outdated was a humorously pertinent word to describe that whole situation.

We sat in silence for a few minutes, both with thoughts simmering, unsure what to say. I didn't want to sit with my thoughts. The news about my parents was both a balm and a thorn, a reminder that life had to go on somehow after all this. The future, beyond the war, hadn't felt like a possibility for me since the Weraynian Scare on Flauraan. I didn't feel like I belonged in it, should reap any of its rewards or comforts. I eyed Sophie, who looked so tense, so tired, and wondered if this felt the same as when she'd reached the end of her mission, her search for her father. Of course, any decisions about the future were thankfully made for her when the Alliance offered her a job, she'd jumped from one enterprise to the next, without losing momentum. Even if I was offered such an opportunity, there was no way I'd be able to take it. Right now, I was tired and drained, and it was hard to imagine a way to recover. And the brokenness and guilt that was following me meant that I didn't trust myself with anything new; how long had I prepared for the Weraynian war, only to learn I was on the wrong side, part of the problem, exacerbating it?

I couldn't risk a venture like this, or Halapatov, again. Who knew what was to happen now? How tentative this temporary peace was?

I felt Sophie's eyes on me again, and I looked up and took her in, traced the dark circles under her eyes with my mind. Perhaps my self-flagellation could wait. Right now she was worried about me, she needed me to be okay. I wanted it all to be okay.

She was still holding my hand, but lightly, as if she was afraid to hurt me. I squeezed her fingers and shifted in the bed, moving all my attachments delicately so that I could sit facing her. Her eyes widened in alarm but she didn't rush to stop me. My whole body felt heavy. I opened my arms and she only hesitated for a moment before she fell into them. I buried my face in her wild hair, and she turned her head and pressed her ear against my chest to listen to my heart beat. We cradled each other for a minute, and then I drew back. I cupped her face the way I had a few days ago, the last time we'd been along together, but this time nothing held me back from kissing her. I forced myself to see the silver linings, resisted the urge to dig my nails into my flesh to remind myself of pain. My mind was blissfully blank for a golden stretch betwen heartbeats, but of course I couldn't prevent it from all flooding back, it was inevitable. I knew I would have no choice but to confront it.

The craft continued on its course to Halapatov, and eventually I was detached from all my monitors, the last fluids deemed adequate for my health. I was prompted to walk with Sophie's supervision, and made slow, stiff laps around the enclosed space. We got a view of Halapatov as we descended that infuriated me, its shining cities perfect and whole, while my memory was filled with the poverty and ruin on Werayne. Medical transports were much slower than the ships we were used to, but we finally reached the spaceport nearest to our destination.

Sophie held onto me as we descended from the medical transport, as I still felt weak, though she wasn't much better - we must have both looked completely shattered.

I was comforted to find that Alexa and Jayken were waiting in the hangar. They were both in ceremonial dress, white garments draped around them. Back on Werayne, Jayken's mother had sent him pictures after learning about his trip to Halapatov and the memory loss it caused, and he'd shown me pictures of his parents dressed similarly; it seemed fitting that this was what they had decided to wear for the occasion. I looked down at my own hospital garb and wondered if I would be expected to change.

I felt more eyes on me, and let my vision wander. On the other side of the hangar another Weraynian hung back. Fondness thrilled through me to see it was Jayken's mother, keeping an eye on us but staying at a comfortable distance so as not to intrude in our reunion. I got the sense that now that she had him back, she wasn't going to let him out of her sight. I understood the feeling well. For the first time since the war began, I didn't find the concept of being watched threatening.

The last images we'd all seen of each other dissolved as we took in each other's conditions. A heavy tiredness hung between us, but it was one of relief, of struggles hard won, somehow.

I still couldn't believe they were real, that I wasn't still dreaming. Lexie was uncharacteristically weepy. She clung onto me while Jayken tackled Sophie. Everything we'd been through together had bonded us in a unique way, and then combining our powers in the Machine had allowed her thoughts and visions to bleed into my mind. I realised as she looked at me that that transferal hadn't been one way, that she had been able to see through my eyes as well, and feel what I felt. There wasn't really a way to walk that back. An odd knot of discomfort settled within me. I was used to being able to feel emotions and thoughts radiating off people in waves, but I wasn't used to other people having such insight into my own thoughts.

I could imagine her holding vigil with Sophie and Jayken, waiting for me to be medically cleared, yet having the same sense of certainty that I'd had that I was going to die, and that I had made peace with it. I could see the distress she must've felt at comforting Sophie with what she thought to be a lie. Here, now, I could see the question in her eyes; how did you survive? I didn't really know the answer. How had we managed to have so many of us escape death by a razor's edge? The only thing I knew was that we hadn't escaped unscathed, the damage done was palpable; Jayken still twitched as if his nerves hadn't settled back into place, Sophie's stump made more obvious by hugs of reunion, and as for me and Lexie... well, all of us were haunted now.

Jayken introduced us to his mother, who treated us like long lost family, which didn't quite feel deserved but it was comforting. My chest ached, and it wasn't long before we departed for wherever we were supposed to go, a group of defectors and Weraynians, navigating the streets of Halapatov.

Our lot was being put up in a hotel near the agreed upon meeting place, and upon entering we were immediately overwhelmed by Aandriggians, greeting person after person with familiar features, members of Alexa's family that had been allowed to travel to support her and Jayken. It was fascinating, watching Lexie transform in this environment, with smiles and jokes and affection. The tension from the war melted from her with surprising ease, but then she would turn and look at me and I would catch a glimpse of her fear there, before she tamped it down again, for everyone's sake. Sophie waved off the concerns of people very perturbed about her missing limb, and we were offered food and drinks. Alexa's fierceness returned in a short while as she asked for a bit of space, and we were escorted upstairs by a smaller conglomerate, to be greeted by our next surprise.

A clunky machine on wheels almost touched the ceiling, blinking with lights and whirring in a way that told me a power source of disturbing strength was held inside, and cables trailed from it to attach to a small device implanted in the side of none other than Beth themself, with Steve and Mickey beside them. Sophie's jaw dropped.

"Beth? What are you doing here?" She exclaimed, which sounded a bit rude but I couldn't blame her, given the last time we'd seen Beth they'd been confined to a bed chamber and still experiencing reality seizures in spite of all the equipment and medical professionals around.

They smiled slyly. "You really think I'd let you all have a big reunion without me?"

There was a lot of medical hesitation between all parties, but it wasn't long before tentative hugs were exchanged, with care not to dislodge devices or hurt anyone. Mickey insisted on giving us all a head to toe assessment, for his own peace of mind. Steve chided Sophie regarding proper care of her prosthetic arm, which was apparently beyond repair now, but they briefly discussed ideas for replacements.

In those moments of reunion, the weight of everything hanging over us didn't feel so crushing, but eventually conversation was forced to turn to the event we had gathered for, which would hopefully mark the end of the war. An understandably disquieting sentiment settled upon us; we all had questions, but so much that had happened was raw and there was a hesitance to ask them. We all danced around specific details, discussing the topics that felt the least delicate. Jayken told the story of seeing his mum again for the first time, Sophie and I were filled in on technical details for the event including the dress code, we guessed what other people we were expecting to see at the gathering.

It turned out that the event was littered with familiar faces. We filed into the meeting hall, in one of the larger sections of the High Court. Sophie and I had visited before, and glimpsed the meeting hall from the balconies above, ordinarily open to the public for viewing. Today the balconies held only those who had been invited, mostly various Aandriggians and Weraynians; this was where the majority of Lexie's family was situated.

Most of our team from Werayne was here, with Hani, Aretha, Satah, Rintoul, and a few other people in leadership roles situated prominently. Behind them, in various groupings, were those I had been expecting to see - The Protector, Terra, Rojjel, Reeina - and some I hadn't - Peg, Trista, Criken, other Paladanians and Halapatovians that we'd seen briefly in our time at HQ.

Observing Reeina sitting in a place of such importance, I wondered if she would be returning to our hometown when all of this was over, if I'd ever get to meet with her one-on-one like we used to before the war. It made me a bit sad to think of my town without her.

The Protector embodied an ominous presence, which honestly probably lent a lot of weight to the proceedings. I didn't trust Staarus government to hold to any promises, in fact a part of me felt a dread that they would shirk responsibility and try to put this whole war in the past as if it was a minor incident, not an attempted genocide by a seemingly endless number of methods. However, between the Alliance's presence as an external sentient rights organisation and the Protector's silent threatening aura, I felt a small spark of hope that my people, and the Halapatovians, would be held to account.

Sophie was wearing her Alliance jacket, as were the rest of her colleagues, though we were sat separately from them, our team of four from Werayne reunited with Rojjel to represent our original team as chosen by Staarus forces. Rojjel appeared astoundingly fatigued, which was hardly a surprise. We weren't really in a space to catch up, but some meaningful expressions were cast between us, and then he tutted when he saw Sophie's jacket sleeve hanging loose over her stump. Some things never change.

Proceedings begun, with a welcome from the Halapatovian representatives, before control of the room was handed over. At least for the present, Hani and Aretha, the leader from Aandrigo, were being treated as de facto represenatives of their respective people's and doing most of the speaking, although Hani went to great lengths to bring attention to Weraynian leaders from other groups scattered across Werayne.

It wasn't as if I wanted any attention on me, but it was a little disorienting to be just one group among so many. Our team was very briefly introduced as part of a larger party but otherwise we weren't given much focus. Everyone knew we were involved in the events immediately preceding the ceasefire, obviously - it would have been impossible to suppress information about an event that sent a shockwave throughout the entire system - but we were just part of the team that was there on Werayne able to reverse it. There were no eyes on me as an individual. No one knew that I'd had my fingernails in the neurons of every Weraynian in the universe.

The history of Staarus treatment of Pecayen, then Werayne and Aandrigo, was thoroughly pored over. Aretha laid out very clearly testimony of poor conditions on Aandrigo. Mickey and Peg spoke on behalf of the Alliance, presenting their perspective from the integration of the Earth-Staarus treaty to witnessing Weraynians outside of the Staarus System, to arriving and supporting the blockade of Werayne, to defecting and providing aid, to surveillance gained from HQ. At a specific point, Rojjel was called forward to present his evidence from the Weraynian prison, alongside Reeina, and then briefly elaborated on the countermeasures put in response to the discovery of the signals, which of course led the discussion to the attempted genocide and aftermath of the same. And there were so many more people I'd never met or heard of who came forward with stories of horrors and injustices I could scarcely imagine. Hours and hours passed; the Weryanian leaders wanted no aspect of the war left unaccounted for. Tension was building in the room. Halapatovian and Paladanian delegates shifted uncomfortably. Weraynians and Aandriggians in the stand were raising their voices, calling for justice.

I hadn't dared to hope for anything before, but now it was burning in my chest. To have us all gathered here, to have the truth told so plainly and not be denied by the Staarus government, that had to count for something. Then again, it was all well and good, us discussing this in a room, but that didn't necessarily translate to real change. Maybe it would only be empty promises. I knew that across the Staarus System so many people would be watching this meeting being broadcast, which at least provided some accountability and responsibility for my people holding to their word. Would anything they had to offer be enough, though? An end to the war was obviously an important and necessary step, but the power imbalance and mistreatment of Weraynians began centuries ago, and would continue even if Staarus forces completely withdrew and nothing more was enacted on Werayne.

I'm not sure how I managed to keep going throughout that long, long day. Every atom in my body felt like it had been splintered. I'd been carried along by adrenaline for weeks now, and it was all I had in me not to completely lose all cognizance. I forced myself to pay attention to the apology and offerings from those chosen to be the Staarus representatives, trying to glean insight into their supposed sincerity. As time went on, and my sense of how things sat with the wider Staarus System improved, I relaxed at least a little in the knowledge that there was little support for the war to continue, and much desire to push this whole matter to the side, as if it was an embarrassing mark on a flawless record. I remembered when the Protector had appeared to us and informed us that we had been away too long, and out of the loop as to public outcry against the war. When the Weraynians had been trapped inside the forcefield, the Weraynian Scares enacted by desperate people became the only source of information about them. But since the force field had broken the whole narrative had been flipped on its head, and thanks to the work of so many people out there, people like Satah and Rintoul, my people and the Halapatovians were flooded with information that challenged everything they'd been taught their entire lives. That wouldn't have been enough to sway long held prejudices but then those on the frontlines were the ones who mostly witnessed the Weraynians at their most vulnerable during the attack. I could see in the eyes of a lot of the people in this room the panic at their perception changing; I'd experienced that panic myself. But it was necessary. And hopefully that discomfort would be able to transform into real solidarity. Only time would tell.

It was truly dark when the assembly let out, and it seemed that an uneasy truce had been reached, for now. Hani announced that more deliberating and consultation would be needed, but the need for all of our numbers in this big gathering ended today. She told the room that we all deserved rest, and we were formally dismissed. People began to file out, but many hung back, and our team at least took the moment just to breathe and process everything that had happened. Still very little felt real. I caught a glimpse of Aandrigo glinting in the sky through the high dome of the ceiling, and my thoughts were a whirl of past and present.

I couldn't help comparing this event to the treaty ceremony on Flauraan all those years ago. There had been so much joy in the aftermath of the treaty signing, but here there was so much uncertainty, and the atmosphere of those remaining was somber, weary. Arguably the end of the war was more of a thing to celebrate, but it still felt so tentative.

I realised Reeina was moving with intent in my direction. I was confounded, but pleased; I didn't feel like I measured much in importance given the nature of everything going on. Of course, this meant that something momentous was likely immminent. That weariness closed in on me again; I forced myself to stand tall, to focus.

All of my effort were wasted, naturally. I watched her eyes soften as she drew near to me, taking in my poor excuse for a real person's body with a remarkable expression of pity. I didn't feel condescended by it - of all Paladanians, Reeina was the one with the strongest ability to look past someone's eyes and catch a glimpse of the reality in their inmost being. It was comforting, to see reflected in her eyes the knowledge that I was in so much pain. She extended a hand to me and I let her pull me away from my team for a private discussion.

"Abigail," she said gently, her expression having recovered from bearing witness to my current weakness. "I'm sure you know I have something to dicuss with you, but first I need to tell you how proud I am of you. I recall so clearly the struggle you have endured with harnessing your powers, and now the whole system has you to thank for your perseverance. Who would've known when they first manifested that they would be put to such a use. I was astounded to see it."

"You were able to see me? All the way from Halapatov?" I rasped, awestruck at her powers myself, but her eyes glittered with amusement and she smiled and shook her head.

"Just a figure of speech, though I'm sure it would have been quite something to behold." In spite of her commendatory words, her expression flickered, betraying that discomfiting knowledge again. I got the sense that she was a little relieved not to have witnessed the nightmare Sophie and I and all around us had lived. "In any case, I am sorry to burden you with something new after what you have already endured, but even with the positive steps that have been taken to end the war, I believe we have an uphill battle ahead of us. The last time we saw each other I said that whatever happened we would see a new world, and I maintain that stance. However, more hearts and minds will need to change to ensure the road ahead of us is not paved with new atrocities."

I felt that curling despair in me again. She was confirming exactly the sort of things I had been thinking. I spoke, mouth dry, "What do you expect me to be able to do?"

She clearly realised the fear she had instilled in me, and swiftly placed a comforting hand on my shoulder. "It is nothing dire, and positively trivial compared to the tasks you have performed thus far. There has been much talk today of reform to Weraynian policy, but there is so much more that needs to change. I think paladanian systems will be a good avenue for discussion of reform, and in particular our hometown, as the setting of the last Weraynian Scare before the War, could benefit greatly and play a role in the education needed to change perspectives Staarus wide. If we are able to implement new ways that recognise the nuance of the Weraynian war, our complicity in it, and push for reparations, a ripple effect could begin that truly changes things for the better."

I nodded, mulling over how right she was. My town had produced a surprising amount of key players in this war, all of us pushed into action by our involvement in the Weraynian Scare. If there was distrust of Weraynians continuing on Flauraan, and I felt certain that was the case, my town could have a vital role in altering the dialogue. We were responsible for Criken, the war hero (though I didn't know if that still held true), Ray, the war criminal (who knew how my people, my family, had reacted to the news of his arrest... how many had cheered him on?), Reeina, the glowing beacon of support for Weraynian rights (she had garnered respect back home, surely her position would have won people over, I needed to believe), and me, the defector, the mind messer, part of the weapon and the one who wielded it. My part in the war was the most publically obscure, so perhaps it was fitting that revelation would be my role to play in the aftermath.

"I'm assuming you have a few concrete ideas on how to make this work already." I stated, instantly proven correct as Reeina indicated such. I continued, trying not to sound too pathetic. "Are you coming home with me?"

Reeina shook her head, expression wistful now. "I wish I could. But I fear it will be many moons before I can make the trip; there is so much for me to help establish here. With their plans to include Weraynian and Aandriggian members on the High Council, I want to help make that process as smooth as possible."

That was a pretty good reason. I must've looked hesitant, because Reeina said gently, "This does not have to be a task for you. If you feel it is too much, there are other Paladanians, activists who have been involved in the organising here, who will be engaged in similar work. I don't offer you this because it needs to be you, but because I thought it might appeal to you, as you adjust in the aftermath of the war."

I reflexively stared over at Sophie, and thought of the blank vision of the future that currently occupied my thoughts. A purpose, no matter the nature, was incredibly welcome to me right now. I looked back to Reeina, my strength less of a facade now. "I think it's just the thing I need."

So now I had some sort of direction, and it seemed that the ceasefire would hold, for now. It wouldn't be too long until I was able to go home, and I would soon have more work to do, for my town and my people. In the meantime, Mickey made sure we all got thoroughly assessed by the Alliance medical team. Discussions and activity continued to go on around me, but after that initial meeting my brain turned to mire, and I spent long stretches in the wake of the assembly just sleeping.

Sophie, meanwhile, though similarly exhausted, had seemingly endless things to follow up and do. I would wake up with her gone, and she would reappear late and tell me about the conversation she had that day; a call to Alliance Base 17, a debrief with Rojjel on the fate of their machines, an encouraging chat with the Protector regarding the progress of the delegation to Werayne by the temporary High Council. One day she came bearing materials delivered from Reeina, which I managed to take a cursory glance over, before putting them aside. Another checkup showed that I was recovering well, and I was prescribed some more medication that added to my fatigue. But of course it was healthy to rest. I wished I could've been more present - it wasn't long before goodbyes began, and I feared being alone again. Farewelling Lexie and Jayken was particularly hard. For so long I had calmed my own anxiety only by ensuring I knew where the both of them were, and now I was to go from having them at arms length to across the world from them. They were returning to the house they'd lived in on the other side of Halapatov, and then Lexie hoped her family woud be able to relocate to Werayne with Jayken and his mother. Jayken was relieved and optimistic about the end to the war, Lexie was cynical, but they were both aligned in their hope to make the most of things while they could. If things escalated again, their families wanted to stay together. Jayken triple checked we were all able to contact each other, and promised that once things settled down we could come to stay with them back home at any time. I forced myself to let go of Lexie so they could alight their transport, and we watched until they were out of sight of the spaceport. I willed myself not to lose it completely at the separation. Sophie and I walked back hand in hand, and the open air helped a little. After that, we tried to get in a short walk whenever we could. Slowly, I started to feel like a person again, and the clouds in my head abated.

Sophie gave me an update on the Alliance's plans. It had been agreed by the Council, in particular the representatives from Werayne and Aandrigo, for the Staarus System to join the Alliance, at least for a probationary period, so that they could benefit from the outside help the sentient rights organisation had to offer. There was a lot of infrastructure needed to be rebuilt on Werayne, and additional oversight with the tense cooperation from Halapatov and Flauraan was appreciated as well. So it would seem there would be a lot to arrange yet for Sophie and her team, who had gotten permission from Alliance Base 17 and approval from the representatives here to begin the process of liaising an Alliance presence in a new system. It sounded like complicated stuff, with lots of paperwork and meetings, a monumental undertaking.

Hearing Sophie talk about all the work as it continued, the clouds rolled over me again. I hadn't wanted to face facts as they appeared, but here we were.

"I have to go home, Sophie." I said. "To Flauraan."

A part of me felt that I ought to be weighed down by guilt by my selfish decision to return home so soon. But the rational mind in me knew that I would have little to offer in Alliance arrangements, and I'd spent far too much time in the past months standing around fruitlessly while other people had jobs to do. I didn't want to be separated from Sophie again so soon, but well, I guess the nature of our relationship meant that this was always where we were going to end up.

Sophie regarded me, unfazed. "I know." I tried to keep it together, to be unbothered as she appeared to be about the need for us to part ways. Then she continued on, "It would've been good if the timing had worked so we could travel together, but once I've organised the preliminary stuff with the others I can join you."

My comprehension skills must have still been suffering. "Join me?"

She was watching me, nervous now. "If you want, I mean. On Flauraan. If that's okay with you."

I stared at her, brain overheating as I processed her words. "But what about your Alliance crew?"

She nodded, eyebrows furrowing. "We'll figure everything out. I'll go and visit them as much as I can, I've promised Mickey playdates with his daughters, but since Robyn left our team doesn't have an official job, so I think it makes the most sense to be here, and be the Alliance contact in the Staarus System. At least, everyone keeps saying that I'm the obvious choice."

I smiled. "You are the obvious choice. You've been here the longest."

She shrugged. "Peg was here for the Weraynian Scare as well, I thought she might want to step up."

I shook my head in amusement, feeling a bit lighter. "So the Alliance is the only reason you want to stay?" I teased.

She cocked her head to the side, not quite catching it. Then she nudged me with her shoulder. "Don't be silly, Abi."

The remaining time on Halapatov passed in a blur. On the last morning before my departure, Sophie and I woke early and made our way to the nearest hill to watch the sunrise. I lay my head on her shoulder and wished she was coming home with me, but of course it was already more than I'd expected that I would continue to have her around at all. I wouldn't be alone to stew with my thoughts. We'd be able to sit on the hill near my house and watch the stars, live our lives without the war hanging over us. It was almost impossible to imagine and yet so near.

Later, more people than I expected came to the spaceport to see me off. The rest of the Alliance team was there, and I said goodbye to Steve and Beth, and Mickey and I shared a long embrace, bonded by all of our time together. I realised I would miss everyone so much. Rojjel came to see me off too, and Reeina was there to give me some final encouraging words, promising me that she, too, would return to Flauraan soon. Then finally the only person left to embrace was Sophie. She told me that hopefully the next time she saw me she would have a new prosthetic. I kissed her goodbye, blushing self consciously with all the eyes on us, and then it was time to leave. Soon Halapatov was a distant light in the view from my window. I made a mental note of how empty the Staarus System felt now, with so few ships and space stations, and the blockade removed. I hoped deeply that this was a sign of better times. I tried to locate Werayne but it wasn't in sight. Instead I fixed my vision on Flauraan, on home.

I had returned home from time away a number of times on my life, due to school trips or my brief travelling with Sophie.

But never like this.

Having been dropped in the spaceport with all my possessions, including the plans and notes which Reeina had entrusted me with, a testament to a future of change, one that I would have a hand in sowing, after everything, I took a transport to my hometown, watching the dying light through the window, and trying to hold down the emotions and images that threatened to engulf me, even now.

I walked the distance between the town and my home, unsure of what I would find. Surely my parents would be there and waiting for me, anxious as always, but in what state? How could our lives continue after the revelations of the war? How could I wake up and face each day with everything behind me? Between each breath, I saw flashes of the past months, Sophie shattered on the plains of Werayne, Beth in their hospital bed struggling to hold onto reality, Jayken's broken body in that Halapatovian prison, and worst of all everything I felt in the gel matrix, with Lexie and I battling to suppress the signals which almost killed us, almost killed all the Weraynians. Even some of what I'd witnessed in the aftermath, in the ceasefire, the broken spirit of people on all sides of the war, pervaded my senses and overwhelmed my memory with pain.

How could I live like that?

The answer was simple; repress it for I had so much more to deal with. For now, my father's pale expression filling with relief as he opened the door and flung his arms around me. Patting my mother on the back in comfort as she wept and then weeping too, standing in the hall for far too long, not even sure how long. Eventually sitting down to a cold dinner, mouth overflowing with food that, despite its temperature, tasted so good after so long away from home. Glancing up to see both their eyes piercing me, full of questions which they refused to ask both for my sake and theirs. Resolving to tell them the stories one day, not now, but when we could all handle it. So they could understand the role I'd played in the events they'd heard of, and the people I'd met who meant so much to me. So they could understand what I had learnt, and how I had changed. So they wouldn't have to step on eggshells around me, worried about the awful memories buried deep inside me. But for now, all that could wait.

Now was a time for change, for all of us, in our lives and the Staarus System as a whole. Soon Sophie would come back and we would do what we could to assist in the reparations and rebuilding. We would live each day with the weight of what was past, and push for something better. But that was okay, it'd be okay. And maybe one day, all the awful stuff could be a memory, a lesson, something that was so absurd that it would be unthinkable that such things could happen, with the world at rest.

For now, we would have to live in hope.

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